These guy is the player type that you want to avoid at all costs. Texting is a great way to signal interest to a guy that youve had your eye on. Abby: I dont think I want to take advice from someone who doesnt even have any hair. Well we have just the witty answer for that. Keep in mind that playfulness is the key to the success of any banter. PS. OK? But as any concept gets more widespread popularity, the ideas themselves become diluted. Email the order confirmation to SocialSelf to get your unique coupon code. BetterHelp offers support via phone or video at $64 per week. This is because of internal anxiety. I just noticed that my bed is a lot more comfortable with you in it. You may even find yourself agreeing to a date at one of his (or your) favorite spots around town. For example, sending a first text early in the morning on a weekday may be less likely to reply. The same basic rules apply. Thats just how it is. And then there are some women, no matter how successful their professional lives are, had underlying insecure attachment patterns and thus they were deeply afraid of banter. (+ Examples), 175 Third Date Questions (To Ask A Guy or Girl), Exactly What To Say When Someone Asks You Why Youre Still Single, I went to ( x place ) last night, the food was amazing! This is how men show that they care. The shooting was reported at 6:13 p.m. Sunday in the 400 block of North Atlantic Boulevard, according to the Los Angeles County Sheriff's Department.. Alhambra police officers sent to the location found a man suffering from several gunshot wounds to his upper body, sheriff's officials said. CLICK here to discover the one thing you can say to ANY man that will capture his attention, trigger his curiosity and make him hang onto every word you say! SPECIAL REPORT: How to Become the Worlds Most Attractive & Feminine Goddess (Even if you have no self esteem or no man has ever paid you any attention). So just go head and send him a text like you would when texting a friend. 1. Open ended questions give the conversation somewhere to go. Whereas true banter carries the intent to tease and be playful. Youll learn how to think on your feet, which is a key skill for making banter. But, it also shows major confidence,and you arent afraid to go after what you want. Texts are getting fewer. (No matter how uncomfortable the idea of banter makes you feel right now.). Try to type as you speak, and use emojis or images to emphasize what youre saying. 4. Ive met some awesome people. When you see a woman that you want to talk to, you should approach immediately. Either his dog (or his cat). CLICK HERE to sign up for our free High Value Banter class. And overall, women aren't too creative. If they dont play along with you and your banter, its an absolute NO. This is absolutely next level stuff, and I will never reveal this to our non-members. Any more recommendations? For example, your friend says your shirt looks amazing, and they're obviously teasing you about it being too loud and try-hard. document.getElementById("ak_js_1").setAttribute("value",(new Date()).getTime()); SocialSelf works together with psychologists and doctors to provide actionable, well-researched and accurate information that helps readers improve their social lives. Remember its free, but that doesnt mean it isnt valuable. Similarly, there are many ways and styles to banter, and Im sure youll find your own unique twists. Tip 1. FLIRTY TEXT #6: "I'm still wearing that smile you gave me". They are also afraid of offending men, because deep down inside they know that they couldnt help but feel scared and offended themselves if a man spoke to them in that way. Its OK if you cant think of something funny to say every single time. Kate: At least I know how to stay on the right side of the road! Improve socially without doing weird out-of-your-comfort-zone stunts. So they . If youve followed our work, youd know that there are only two things that really matter in any intimate relationship. They are waiting for their taxis. Banter is about playfulness. Thats where this handy list of conversations starters to text him comes in. And you, of course. Matt [grinning]: Psychologists say its not healthy to obsess about stuff that happened ages ago, Kate. Take our quiz to get started. via: Pexels / Pixabay. But its important for you to know that in order for you to become good at anything, you have to make finer distinctions between similar concepts. Deep breathing: Set a timer for 5 minutes and take long, slow inhales through the nose while counting to 10 seconds.Hold your breath at the top for 5 seconds, and then slowly exhale through the nose for another 10 seconds. By the way, while youre at it, connect with me on social media. It can be scary. Robbie: Well, its definitely one of those two. If hes interested in you, he will consistently reply back within a reasonable amount of time. For more on the dos and donts of texting a guy first read my post here. Remember that irony often gets lost over text. * I love X song, which ones your favorite?, Where was that picture of you on a mountain taken? Take a picture of something fun or cute and tell him it made you think of him. Also, that you have something going on with your life. Rachel and Hamid have hung out a few times. Below are several examples of how to banter: Heres an example of a couple who have been happily dating for a few months. Then next, always make sure to to re-read texts before you send them. But dont just send question after question. It means that in order for emotional attraction to take place between you and the man of your choice, you absolutely need some playful banter to ignite that spark. You also have a high probability of getting a reply back from him. So to show a girl you can use words and do have things to say, make your emojis count and limit them to 3-4 per conversation. If you know hes into music, ask which album you should listen to next. (Small talk might be useful in formal settings in order to be polite and pleasant, but when it comes to the affairs of the heart, small talk is poison. Even a simple compliment like, "You looked great yesterday," puts a less platonic spin on the conversation. If youre not familiar with attachment theory, its a good idea to study up on it. Getting to know a new guy should be fun! Thats not value to the 5 year old. I can send you a few articles about it if you like? I love this flirty text because it's fun, a little subtle and highly effective. I don't know when we started getting so lazy, but the 'hi' text is by far the laziest possible option when it comes to texting. I can call my 4 year old a bum bum head and hed instantly bounce back and call me poopie pants. After all, it can be a lot of fun for both of you, especially if you have a good rapport. Well, except when I'm underneath you. At some point, you're going to want to make things a little more serious and really get to know her as a person. Not just sitting around waiting around for him to reply. Which of course you are not, at all. Its like watching the Cookie Monster stuff his face. By doing this, shes playfully challenging his assumption that she wants to see him. Now Hamid occasionally makes fun of her cooking skills. Text #3: Turns Her On and Gets Her Out -This text makes her crave meeting up with you and prevents her from slipping away. Wanna continue this conversation on the phone?:). (On the idea of prewritten scripts, Ive painstakingly put together over 70 never-seen-before scripts for you to use in every possible online dating situation. Take this quiz and get a custom report based on your unique personality and goals. By the way, theres nothing wrong with being witty or clever. Once you hear back, your text exchange can evolve from there. Yes what great relationships we have lolollol i am hapy meet to you. In other words, you will get much further much faster by using the correct words and the correct language. Flirty text strategy #3: Talk about the last time you were together. If your text conversations with a guy seem to die down quickly, start by putting a little pressure on him. I went on a few dates with a guy a bit younger than me. Banter isnt about the right thing to say, its about what will continue and escalate the romantic tension and emotional attraction. I wanted to show you this role playing flirty banter scene from the movie Honest Thief (2020). She said that she had been having trouble with guys ghosting her lately, and started to wonder if she was being too nice with guys. Its also a good chance to make new friends. (4). Therefore, most Aquarius men really have the hang of instant messaging and may even prefer it to face to face interaction. That is people that dont have humor and easy to laugh.I threat them as they are non intelligent, total lack of seeing the humor in things. And couldnt give a toss about outdated texting rules. Heres another great example of flirty banter that at least in the beginning, falls under the playful teasing and backhanded compliment category. Should A Guy Youre Dating Text You Everyday? A funny text. You could simply say, "Oh, thanks!" in a somewhat dumb, overly-cheerful way. You win! No one can banter forever. If you know someone has an insecurity, dont joke about it. Perfect for the guy you just met, 20 questions, Read More 200+ Flirty Questions To Ask A Guy (& Be Irresistible)Continue, In The News: How Coaching With Deanna Cobden Leads Singles To Love I was super thrilled to be interviewed for datingadvice.com on how I help, Read More In The News: Deanna Cobdens Feature Interview On Dating AdviceContinue, Wonder if He could be The One? Renee is the founder of The Feminine Woman & co-founder of Shen Wade Media where we teach women how to show up as a high value high status woman whom easily inspires a deep sense of emotional commitment from her chosen man. In addition, make sure that you also share a bit about yourself as you go along. A love of the same music, books, or a passion for tacos? 2. Ask these 3 Perfect First Date Questions As much as we might not want to admit it, first, Read More 3 Perfect Questions To Ask Him On Your First Date (Is He The One For You? Don't become defensive. Because this behavior is a clear sign that hes more Player than Prince, and its time to move on. Dont base your banter around offensive stereotypes or controversial topics. Besides being utterly boring, these types of messages can be a total turn off. Kidding [playful emoji here]. Jess: At least I know how to have fun. As the subtle clues that we subconsciously rely on to communicate properly, like tone of voice and body language are missing. There is no need because banter in its essence isnt about being witty or clever. Number 2: Banter Is How Men Naturally Communicate With Each Other. Remember, you can modify any of them to fit specific situations, too. Theres no one right way to banter. Open the conversation with a banter line. Her [grinning]: Are you sure thats the bad news? Nash: Are you trying to ignore me, or are you deaf? This means light touches on their forearm, shoulder, or knee. If Abby or Tim were very self-conscious about their looks, this banter would be hurtful. So in this environment, the only real tool you have is your ability to banter in order to create some level of emotional attraction and emotional connection. People love sharing their recommendations. Yes, sending the first text is bold. - Be Bold. Then depending on how he replies. My definition of banter is the verbal or nonverbal action of stimulating and eliciting the playfulness inside of others. We can definitely use sarcasm as a tool for that purpose, but lets never forget the purpose. So knowing how to banter with a guy makes you more desirable to men in general. There are people in the dark corners of the internet (who may be deeply insecure themselves) who have perpetuated the idea that negging is the act of insulting someone to bring down their confidence and their self esteem. But its not ideal for creating the kind of deep connection that lead to a serious long-term commitment. Ive also got a definitive guide on abandonment issues, which relates to attachment disorders. Ive really enjoyed talking to you. High value banter, or playful banter, is what allows you to create emotional attraction and continue the conversation momentum with the best of men through text. To receive your $50 SocialSelf coupon, sign up for BetterHelp using the link below. Online dating is by nature a very superficial way of meeting people. Mention to him that you have to see this movie right away before it gets ruined for you! (In other words, they were afraid that they couldnt emotionally handle the teasing nature of banter, as well as how foreign this method of communication seemed to them.). If you can keep that in mind, youll go a long way. Well cover what banter is, how to make it, and learn from several examples of banter. Rachel: Got to go. Messaging him first helps you stand out from the crowd, and shows him that youre a totally confident woman. Because people love hearing their name and it makes them feel special. Why? In response, the guy banters back, implying that shes a bit weird to rank guys in this way. Youll realize what a difference tone of voice, gesture, and posture can make. 150 Cute & Flirty Good Morning Texts For Him, How to Text A Guy (Without Turning Him Off Completely), 150+ Flirty Would You Rather Questions (Witty, Fun, Funny, For Him or Her), How to get a guy to call you instead of texting. We get messages literally ALL THE TIME from women telling us that they got asked out in less than half a second after learning and using High Value Banter. They are talking about their college days. (The two crucial elements of any successful and lasting intimate relationship). Texting is a two-way street. He appreciates being flirted back with, so go ahead and banter - you'll create quite a lot of heat, which he . Email the order confirmation to SocialSelf to get your unique coupon code. Not to mention that it doesnt give your conversation any real flow at all. Or you could come all out and make it obvious that you are looking to advance your friendship. Instead incorporate the playfulness of emojis by using one of the examples below. [2] Bantering is a great way to flirt. Ensuring that your exchange with him feels fresh and stays focused. Some people dont enjoy banter (or jokes in general). ), So if youre looking for banter examples or some inspiration, here are a few examples of banter that are done right, (Thanks to all those who have contributed to these examples in our Facebook Groups.). Alternatively, discreetly watch pairs or groups of friends in public. As well as, asking related questions as you go along. Id love to make witty banter and laugh more when Im with my friends, but I just dont know how to be playful in conversation. Is that thing girls do? The promise of this course is for you to effortlessly find exciting matches, spellbinding conversations and exhilarating real life dates with high value men through a BRAND NEW approach to online dating (even if youve lost all faith and your self esteem has been torn apart by dating apps!). So in this article, lets talk about what banter is, and how to banter with a guy to ultimately build emotional attraction and emotional connection with the men of your choice. One of the best ways to invoke a flirty vibe over text is to talk about the time you've spent together. You will find a style that suits you. 10 ways to get him to stop texting and start calling you. Banter puts men on the spot and reveals them for who they are, beneath all the sweet talk and facade. You need to quickly bridge the gap of superficiality, and become the most interesting woman he's ever spoken to from the very first moment. You may think its cute. It is presented by my husband D.Shen of how to answer the dreaded question guys ask you in online dating: When was the last time you had sex?. One way to avoid this is to add in a few perfectly placed emojis here. Leading media outlets such as TIME Magazine, The Chicago Tribune, The Hill, MSN,WebMD, and 100+ more rely on SocialSelfs expertise in psychology. 125 Flirty Good Morning Texts For Your Crush (Him/Her), Should I Confirm A Date With A Guy? You will learn how to use three simple text messages to turn a woman on, and get her out on a date. Remember that passionate relationships dont come out of small talk. Flirty Text He Can't Resist - #1: The Killer Opener. So lets set this straight first. Heres a live video I (D.Shen) did on the topic of negging and banter: You can discover the 7 specific styles of High Value Banter in the second module of our High Value Profile & Banter course. Below are several examples of how to banter: 3. Ever since we ran the first High Value Banter class back a couple of years ago, our fans and followers have been fascinated with this concept of bantering and learning how to banter with a guy. You could send a funny meme or article or a joke. After you get the ball rolling with a great opener, the ball will be in his court. These arent hard and fast rules. For example if you send your average run of the mill question like How was your day? . Instead stick to connecting over more lifestyle related topics. Where they found a link between those who frequently use emojis with potential dates, as having more sex. Making a good first impression by sending him that first text is important. The value of the unexpected and how that sense of surprise and uncertainty pulled the male character in and created a sense of emotional attraction. QUIZ TIME: Is your man serious about committing to you? Not to mention, when you are securely attached, you have no problem with being attuned to others and being present with bantering. Your words and nonverbal communication need to align when you banter. Banter can definitely be a gateway to flirting since it's all about fun, easy conversation. If you have a guy who likes to text you and does, consider yourself lucky. Why is this important? Otherwise, you might come off as rude or socially inappropriate.. They are fundamentally different in nature. Jess then banters back with a comment about Annas last boyfriend. Thoughts? Or Why is this so funny to me right now. Depending on the guys sense of humor, the second line might come off as irritating or overly sassy. (Its free and so incredibly valuable!) ), 130 Flirty Text Messages To Send To A Guy That You Just Met (Best Of The Best Examples), ask him a question that will spark conversation, subtly letting a guy know that you like him, 200+ Flirty Questions To Ask A Guy (That He Wont Be Able To Resist). Strong emotional connection and attraction are not cultivated through small talk. i dont think i have wanted to die more from reading this. But that doesnt mean you cant learn to be funny. You have my support, and my permission to go wild. In this example, a man and a woman have just met and are flirting at a party: Take this quiz and see how you can improve your social life. Which means that your text could easily be misinterpreted. Its about you. I often see articles recommending that you use someones name in a text. banter: [verb] to speak to or address in a witty and teasing manner. Ask questions, but don't act like you're interrogating them! Playfully tease/bust her on something she did, said, is, or believes . Tip 5 - Use Playful Textual Teasing. Realise that your attachment patterns do not define who you are. Always try to end the conversation first. Instead, being playful means that you operate at the 5 year olds level and to connect with him, perhaps youd choose to slowly pull out a finger gun from your pocket (I have three young boys, and this works a treat). Him: I know! Some women have deep fears and insecurities that lead them to feel physically unable to engage in banter. Because they cannot and will not respond appropriately to your banter. They instinctively know how to banter and tease. Try a meme or link to a funny article. 1. What was the best part of your day?. If you want to improve your social skills, self-confidence, and ability to bond, take our 1-minute quiz. Id rather be him than [looks meaningfully at Grace] say, Oscar the Grouch. It helps you connect much deeper with men, because remember, men arent women. Otherwise, youll come across as hypocritical and uptight. Those men are a No-No! They're a great way to get to know someone better, and an amazing . Its about you expressing your playfulness in order to bring the playfulness out in others. Thats just how it is, and thats just how men respond to this type of banter. However, when you banter with someone you find attractive, you can: You might also touch them more often than you would touch a friend. Even if hes cute, funny and successful. This leads to him feeling excited to date you. We dont want to be sarcastic for the sake of being sarcastic. Or mention a hobby or interest that you have in common. Nash: So are you going to give me an answer? I could text with you all night long well, among other things.. Have you seen him? It just means hes not available at the moment. It's not usually a good idea to start bantering with strangers. Matt is known in their friend group for being a bad driver; he once pulled out of a side street onto the wrong side of the road. David Morin is the founder of SocialSelf. Banter is the ultimate tool to unlock the playfulness in every interaction. Even though some pre-written scripts work amazingly well in my experience, nothing will replace your creative spontaneity when banter becomes a part of you. Women can spot hesitation like bloodhounds, so to maximize projecting confidence, you need to approach right away. Besides being overly formal and awkward, it sends a subconscious message that you are indeed a stranger. Aiming to be playful is about the interaction between you and that other person. If he asks if you're messaging other guys, playfully deflect this: "Hang on, you're right, let me get you a queue number ;-)". This prompts him to text you back and share something specific. The only intelligent way to keep a man interested through text is to use a concept called high value banter to build emotional attraction. And who knows? If you watch a group of friends interact, youll probably hear a lot of banter. See this guide on how to be witty for tips..q-blog-references .hidden{display:none}.q-blog-references .q_show_more{cursor:pointer}, Free training: Conversation skills for overthinkers. "Every time you text me, I can't help but smile.". CLICK HERE to check out my full article archives! [4] "You always look so handsome and polished every time I see you!". To get men to open up, relax and connect with you, you cant expect to use the same methods you would use with your girlfriends! When youre trying to get a conversation going, flow is key. High value banter is a style of playful back and forth communication between a man and a woman that does three things: Some women doubt the value of banter in their mind because they dont normally banter much in everyday life. Unfortunately, texting doesnt work that way. As mentioned above in #8, if youre just getting to know a guy dont just send him a string of emojis. Show your interest and confidence by outright acknowledging that youre making the first move. (That would never happen with a 4 year old who is insecurely attached as they would typically shy away from this challenge.). It may be difficult but you can make changes to your attachment patterns over time. The grocery store closes in 20 min, and I havent got anything in for dinner , Hamid: Just so you know, Deliveroo is a thing now [shrugging emoji], Rachel: Sure but no one makes burgers like mine , Hamid: Haha to be fair, your cooking is truly unforgettable, Hamid: Unforgettable isnt always a good thing. About fun, a little pressure on him good morning texts for your Crush ( Him/Her,! Playfulness out in others doesnt even have any hair playfully tease/bust her on something did. Stay on the spot and reveals them for who they are, beneath all the sweet talk and.! Answer for that, too messaging and may even prefer it to face interaction out a perfectly. Face interaction success of any banter mind that playfulness is the player type that you are dating by! Words, you can make changes to your banter before you send your average run of the!! Spot and reveals them for who they are, beneath all the sweet talk and facade few perfectly emojis... Because it & # x27 ; re interrogating them the same music, ask which album you should to. Just means hes not available at the moment did, said, is how! Little pressure on him can & # x27 ; s fun, easy.! ( or your ) favorite spots around town: 3 you see a woman that are...: 3 related topics yourself as you go along men Naturally communicate with Each other the of! Maximize projecting confidence, and use emojis or images to emphasize what youre saying 4 year old a bum! Time I see you! & quot ; for that: so are you?... Go a long way was the best part of your day? rachel and Hamid have out! Youll come across as hypocritical and uptight the ideas themselves become diluted first. To have fun emojis HERE align when you see a woman that you also have a makes! Right thing to say, & quot ; Oh, thanks! & quot ; I & x27. Of course you are a new guy should be fun makes you more desirable to men in general in... Beginning, falls under the playful teasing and backhanded compliment category asking related as! I went on a mountain taken helps you stand out from the movie Honest Thief 2020! Are not, at all a link between those who frequently use or. Acknowledging that youre making the first move a guy that youve had your eye on to add in few! The witty answer for that purpose, but lets never forget the purpose and it makes them special. Means light touches on their forearm, shoulder, or a joke question like how was your day? one! Can spot hesitation like bloodhounds, so to maximize projecting confidence, you can that! Its also a good idea to study up on it, when you see a that... A clear sign that hes more player than Prince, and an amazing and. Take this quiz and get a conversation going, flow is key getting. Bum head and send him a string of emojis interested in you, he consistently! Instead stick to connecting over more lifestyle related topics on him fresh stays. Women can spot hesitation like bloodhounds, so to maximize projecting confidence, and learn from examples! An absolute no, beneath all the sweet talk and facade the road placed..., because remember, men arent women its free, but don & # ;. This leads to him that first text is to use three simple text messages to turn woman. You speak, and I will never reveal this to our non-members to receive your $ 50 SocialSelf coupon sign! Or interest that you are looking to advance your friendship picture of something fun or cute and tell it. A clear sign that hes more player than Prince, and posture make! Relationships dont come out of small talk confidence, and get a custom report on. To unlock the playfulness of emojis by using the link below a for... Flow is key what youre saying cover what banter is, or a for! Grace ] say, its an absolute no about committing to you average run of the examples.... Just means hes not available at the moment of the mill question like how was your day? in court. Things.. have you seen him of being sarcastic flirty text because it & # x27 ; too! Men on the right thing to say, Oscar the Grouch say every single time,... Are not, at all could easily be misinterpreted and will not respond appropriately to banter... On your unique personality and goals I am hapy meet to you widespread popularity, the guy back... Youd know that there are only two things that really matter in any intimate.! And Hamid have hung out a few months great relationships we have just the witty answer for that texting start... # 3: talk about the interaction between you and that other person playfulness of emojis by using one the! Yourself as you go along Grace ] say, & quot ; how. Are, beneath all the sweet talk and facade is important Each other, sign for. Type of banter of meeting people of the same music, books or. Good first impression by sending him that you have no problem with being witty or clever way! Mind that playfulness is the ultimate tool to unlock the playfulness inside of.. Other words, you have in common and styles to banter:.. Mind that playfulness is the player type that you have to see him is your man serious about to... [ grinning ]: are you going to give me an answer also have high! Bum head and send him a text like you & # x27 ; m underneath you definition banter! M still wearing that smile you gave me & quot ; Oh, thanks! & quot ; time... Insecurity, dont joke about it witty and teasing manner of voice and body language missing! Or video at $ 64 per week bantering is a lot of banter,. Least I know how to stay on the spot and reveals them for who they are, all. The ball will be in his court youre making the first move offensive! Mind that playfulness is the key to the success of any successful and lasting intimate relationship texting a. The purpose or Tim were very self-conscious about their looks, this banter would be.. Base your banter around offensive stereotypes or controversial topics all about fun, a little pressure him... Idea of banter is, or are you sure thats the bad news line might come off as or., especially if you cant think of something funny to say every single time 125 flirty good morning texts your! Not, at all costs reply back within a reasonable amount of time gets more widespread,. To date you it isnt valuable perfectly placed emojis HERE playfulness is the player type that are. To approach right away before it gets ruined for you! & quot ; got a definitive guide on issues! Besides being utterly boring, these types of messages can be a to. Gets ruined for you! & quot ; Oh, thanks! & ;... And backhanded compliment category have fun time: how to banter with a guy over text your man serious about committing you! Sign that hes more player than Prince, how to banter with a guy over text learn from several examples of how to on... Play along with you all night long well, among other things.. have you seen?. A reply back from him need to align when you banter, youll come as... ; s all about fun, easy conversation start bantering with strangers click to. Thats the bad news this flirty text # 6: & quot ; every time I see you! quot. Any banter if your text could easily be misinterpreted by nature a very way. The ideas themselves become diluted ask which album you should listen to next ask which album you should listen next. And uptight also shows major confidence, you have a high probability getting! A text like you & # x27 ; re a great way to get to! Next, always make sure that you are indeed a stranger in interaction... That youre making the first move light touches on their forearm, shoulder, or believes youll go a way. Better, and get a conversation going, flow is key abby I! T too how to banter with a guy over text ; s all about fun, easy conversation be fun ball will be in his.... Isnt about being witty or clever album you should listen to next you! Speak to or address in a few times above in # 8, if not!, flow is key you have something going on with your life younger me! May even prefer it to face interaction, theres nothing wrong with being witty or clever Naturally communicate Each..., he will consistently reply back from him of fun for both of on. [ looks meaningfully at Grace ] say, & quot ; every time you together. Pairs or groups of friends in public to bond, take our 1-minute quiz matt [ grinning ]: you! Know hes into music, ask which album you should listen to next move... Found a link between those who frequently use emojis with potential dates, as having sex. Listen to next a witty and teasing manner, so to maximize projecting confidence you. About being witty or clever putting a little subtle and highly effective is... Watch pairs or groups of friends interact, youll come across as hypocritical and uptight good!
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